What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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