Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
You've changed since you got that strap on
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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