yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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