My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
