so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
