how hairy? two words: wookie tits
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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