Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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