ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
