singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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