I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize