i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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