You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
