three words: i give head
three words: not that well
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
He shit in the fireplace
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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