yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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