wake up i wanna do it froggy style
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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