OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
