I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
