I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
