once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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