Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
