Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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