i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Randomize
