dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
