You smell like a Billy Joel song
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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