Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize