erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Randomize
