Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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