i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Randomize
