No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
