I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
This is classic penis vs brain.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
