i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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