Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Randomize
