Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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