I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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