bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
This house was built for laser tag.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I'm determined to sit on that face.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize