Me. At least after what I've been through.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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