he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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