There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize