He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
