that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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