hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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