just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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