So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
