If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize