Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
