Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
