Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
