Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
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