I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Naked Twister starts at high noon
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
