I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
i think im in europe. pls send help
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
