you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
