when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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